Things you should never say to a MUA

1. How long will all this take?

2. Your brushes are clean, right?

3. I’m not sure if I’m going to like this, no offense to you! I don’t really wear makeup. (have a little faith, I’m one of the good ones)

4. I have to be out the door in 10 minutes, is that enough time? (😂

5. Are your brushes vegan?

6. Can we be quiet? My kids are sleeping upstairs (np, I would prefer it if you don’t speak)

7. If I sleep in this makeup, will it last all day tomorrow? (lol)

8. Will fake eyelashes make me look fake?

9. I found a bunch of inspo pics for my look tonight, I’m thinking I want to look sort of like this or maybe like that, or that, or that one I really like. But, I want to look VERY natural, and I don’t like eyeliner at all or lashes (all the photos are extreme glam with eyeliner and lashes)

10. Where are you from? (do you really care?)

11. Client begins letting her kid crawl all over her and touch her face, I struggle to finish, the kid tries to take my makeup from me. Client laughs

12. Sorry, my dogs get a little excited but they’re friendly!! (dogs wildly jumping all over me, barking, drooling, knocking over my stuff, scratching my leg)

13. My daughter loves makeup, can she play with your stuff?

14. How much do you charge for just a little makeup and some lashes? (more then you think)

15. Sorry if my kids are a little loud (children screaming and running around the house, looking at my kit and asking me questions about everything when I am trying to do mascara and have another appt right after on the other side of the city.

16. How much longer do you think this going to take?

17. OMG, I don’t look like myself! (yes you do. Better even.)

18. Is there any way I can take that lipstick with me? (do I look like a sephora?)

19. I never wear any makeup, does it look too much? (NO)

20. How do you know how to do this?

21. Can you make me look like this? (shows filtered IG image)

22. Oh my god. I love it, I really do, but can we take off the lashes? And maybe the liner? Would that mess things up?

23. How much longer?

24. Sorry, I just need to send this quick email to work (20 min head down when I am trying to do under eye concealer)

25. How long have you been doing this? (forever)

26. Sorry, change of schedule. The director needs you to take her back to the look before, the glam look. We need to get this done before lunch. How long will that take?

27. Can you make me look like Hailey Beiber?

28. Can I watch? (client’s boyfriend asks coyly, sitting down a little too close and staring at us)